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Jon Cryer
as
Alan Harper
Two and a Half Men
1x01 Most Chicks Won't Eat Veal
2003-09-22
1x02 Big Flappy Bastards
2003-09-29
1x03 Go East on Sunset Until You Reach the Gates of Hell
2003-10-06
1x04 If I Can't Write My Chocolate Song, I'm Going to Take a Nap
2003-10-13
1x05 The Last Thing You Want Is to Wind Up with a Hump
2003-10-20
1x06 Did You Check with the Captain of the Flying Monkeys?
2003-10-27
1x07 If They Do Go Either Way, They're Usually Fake
2003-11-03
1x08 Twenty-Five Little Pre-Pubers Without a Snoot-Ful
2003-11-10
1x09 Phase One, Complete
2003-11-17
1x10 Merry Thanksgiving
2003-11-24
1x11 Alan Harper, Frontier Chiropractor
2003-12-15
1x12 Camel Filters and Pheromones
2004-01-05
1x13 Sarah Like Puny Alan
2004-01-12
1x14 I Can't Afford Hyenas
2004-02-02
1x15 Round One to the Hot Crazy Chick
2004-02-09
1x16 That Was Saliva, Alan
2004-02-16
1x17 Ate the Hamburgers, Wearing the Hats
2004-02-23
1x18 An Old Flame with a New Wick
2004-03-01
1x19 I Remember the Coatroom, I Just Don't Remember You
2004-03-22
1x20 Hey, I Can Pee Outside in the Dark
2004-04-19
1x21 No Sniffing, No Wowing
2004-05-03
1x22 My Doctor Has a Cow Puppet
2004-05-10
1x23 Just Like Buffalo
2004-05-17
1x24 Can You Feel My Finger?
2004-05-24
2x01 Back Off, Mary Poppins
2004-09-20
2x02 Enjoy Those Garlic Balls
2004-09-27
2x03 A Bag Full of Jawea
2004-10-04
2x04 Go Get Mommy's Bra
2004-10-11
2x05 Bad News from the Clinic?
2004-10-18
2x06 The Price of Healthy Gums Is Eternal Vigilance
2004-10-25
2x07 A Kosher Slaughterhouse Out in Fontana
2004-11-08
2x08 Frankenstein and the Horny Villagers
2004-11-15
2x09 Yes, Monsignor
2004-11-22
2x10 The Salmon Under My Sweater
2004-11-29
2x11 Last Chance to See Those Tattoos
2004-12-13
2x12 A Lungful of Alan
2005-01-03
2x13 Zejdz z Zmoich WlosĂłw (Get Off My Hair)
2005-01-17
2x14 Those Big Pink Things with Coconut
2005-01-31
2x15 Smell the Umbrella Stand
2005-02-07
2x16 Can You Eat Human Flesh with Wooden Teeth?
2005-02-14
2x17 Woo-Hoo, a Hernia Exam!
2005-02-21
2x18 It Was 'Mame', Mom
2005-03-07
2x19 A Low, Guttural Tongue-Flapping Noise
2005-03-21
2x20 I Always Wanted a Shaved Monkey
2005-04-18
2x21 A Sympathetic Crotch to Cry On
2005-05-02
2x22 That Old Hose Bag Is My Mother
2005-05-09
2x23 Squab, Squab, Squab, Squab, Squab
2005-05-16
2x24 Does This Smell Funny to You?
2005-05-23
3x01 Weekend in Bangkok with Two Olympic Gymnasts
2005-09-19
3x02 Principal Gallagher's Lesbian Lover
2005-09-26
3x03 Carpet Burns and a Bite Mark
2005-10-03
3x04 Your Dismissive Attitude Toward Boobs
2005-10-10
3x05 We Called It Mr. Pinky
2005-10-17
3x06 Hi, Mr. Horned One
2005-10-24
3x07 Sleep Tight, Puddin' Pop
2005-11-07
3x08 That Voodoo That I Do Do
2005-11-14
3x09 Madame and Her Special Friend
2005-11-21
3x10 Something Salted and Twisted
2005-11-28
3x11 Santa's Village of the Damned
2005-12-19
3x12 That Special Tug
2006-01-09
3x13 Humiliation Is a Visual Medium
2006-01-23
3x14 Love Isn't Blind, It's Retarded
2006-02-06
3x15 My Tongue Is Meat
2006-02-27
3x16 Ergo, the Booty Call
2006-03-06
3x17 The Unfortunate Little Schnauzer
2006-03-13
3x18 The Spit-Covered Cobbler
2006-03-20
3x19 Golly Moses, She's a Muffin
2006-04-10
3x20 Always a Bridesmaid, Never a Burro
2006-04-24
3x21 And the Plot Moistens
2006-05-01
3x22 Just Once with Aunt Sophie
2006-05-08
3x23 Arguments for the Quickie
2006-05-15
3x24 That Pistol-Packin' Hermaphrodite
2006-05-22
4x01 Working for Caligula
2006-09-18
4x02 Who Is This Vod Kanockers?
2006-09-25
4x03 The Sea Is a Harsh Mistress
2006-10-02
4x04 A Pot-Smokin' Monkey
2006-10-09
4x05 A Live Woman of Proven Fertility
2006-10-16
4x06 Apologies for the Frivolity
2006-10-23
4x07 Repeated Blows to His Unformed Head
2006-11-06
4x08 Release the Dogs
2006-11-13
4x09 Corey's Been Dead for an Hour
2006-11-20
4x10 Kissing Abe Lincoln
2006-11-27
4x11 Walnuts and Demerol
2006-12-11
0x38 Backstage Tour with Angus T. Jones
2007-01-01
0x39 Two Adults, One Kid, No Grown-ups
2007-01-01
4x12 Castrating Sheep in Montana
2007-01-08
4x13 Don't Worry, Speed Racer
2007-01-22
4x14 That's Summer Sausage, Not Salami
2007-02-05
4x15 My Damn Stalker
2007-02-12
4x16 Young People Have Phlegm Too
2007-02-19
4x17 I Merely Slept with a Commie
2007-02-26
4x18 It Never Rains in Hooterville
2007-03-19
4x19 Smooth as a Ken Doll
2007-04-09
4x20 Aunt Myra Doesn't Pee a Lot
2007-04-16
4x21 Tucked, Taped and Gorgeous
2007-04-23
4x22 Mr. McGlue's Feedbag
2007-04-30
4x23 Anteaters. They're Just Crazy-Lookin'
2007-05-07
4x24 Prostitutes and Gelato
2007-05-14
5x01 Large Birds, Spiders and Mom
2007-09-24
5x02 Media Room Slash Dungeon
2007-10-01
5x03 Dum Diddy Dum Diddy Doo
2007-10-08
5x04 City of Great Racks
2007-10-15
5x05 Putting Swim Fins on a Cat
2007-10-22
5x06 Help Daddy Find His Toenail
2007-10-29
5x07 The Leather Gear Is in the Guest Room
2007-11-05
5x08 Is There a Mrs. Waffles?
2007-11-12
5x09 Shoes, Hats, Pickle Jar Lids
2007-11-19
5x10 Kinda Like Necrophilia
2007-11-26
0x40 The Serious Business of Writing Comedy
2008-01-01
0x41 A Day in the Life of Two and a Half Men
2008-01-01
5x11 Meander to Your Dander
2008-03-17
5x12 A Little Clammy and None Too Fresh
2008-03-24
5x13 The Soil Is Moist
2008-03-31
5x14 Winky-Dink Time
2008-04-14
5x15 Rough Night in Hump Junction
2008-04-21
5x16 Look At Me Mommy, I'm Pretty
2008-04-28
5x17 Fish in a Drawer
2008-05-05
5x18 If My Hole Could Talk
2008-05-12
5x19 Waiting for the Right Snapper
2008-05-19
6x01 Taterhead Is Our Love Child
2008-09-22
6x02 Pie Hole, Herb
2008-09-29
6x03 Damn You, Eggs Benedict
2008-10-06
6x04 The Flavin' and the Mavin'
2008-10-13
6x05 A Jock Strap in Hell
2008-10-20
6x06 It's Always Nazi Week
2008-11-03
6x07 Best H.O. Money Can Buy
2008-11-10
6x08 Pinocchio's Mouth
2008-11-17
6x09 The Mooch at the Boo
2008-11-24
6x10 He Smelled the Ham, He Got Excited
2008-12-08
6x11 The Devil's Lube
2008-12-15
6x12 Thank God for Scoliosis
2009-01-12
6x13 I Think You Offended Don
2009-01-19
6x14 David Copperfield Slipped Me a Roofie
2009-02-02
6x15 I'd Like to Start with the Cat
2009-02-09
6x16 She'll Still Be Dead At Halftime
2009-03-02
6x17 The 'Ocu' or the 'Pado'?
2009-03-09
6x18 My Son's Enormous Head
2009-03-16
6x19 The Two Finger Rule
2009-03-30
6x20 Hello, I Am Alan Cousteau
2009-04-13
6x21 Above Exalted Cyclops
2009-04-27
6x22 Sir Lancelot's Litter Box
2009-05-04
6x23 Good Morning Mrs. Butterworth
2009-05-11
6x24 Baseball Was Better with Steroids
2009-05-18
7x01 818-JKLPUZO
2009-09-21
7x02 Whipped Unto the Third Generation
2009-09-28
7x03 Mmm, Fish. Yum.
2009-10-05
7x04 Laxative Tester, Horse Inseminator
2009-10-12
7x05 For the Sake of the Child
2009-10-19
7x06 Give Me Your Thumb
2009-11-02
7x07 Untainted by Filth
2009-11-09
7x08 Gorp. Fnark. Schmegle.
2009-11-16
7x09 Captain Terry's Spray-On Hair
2009-11-23
7x10 That's Why They Call It "Ball Room"
2009-12-07
7x11 Warning, It's Dirty
2009-12-14
7x12 Fart Jokes, Pie and Celeste
2010-01-11
7x13 Yay, No Polyps!
2010-01-18
7x14 Crude and Uncalled For
2010-02-01
7x15 Aye, Aye, Captain Douche
2010-02-08
7x16 Tinkle Like a Princess
2010-03-01
7x17 I Found Your Moustache
2010-03-08
7x18 Ixnay on the Oggie Day
2010-03-22
7x19 Keith Moon Is Vomiting in His Grave
2010-04-12
7x20 I Called Him Magoo
2010-05-10
7x21 Gumby with a Pokey
2010-05-17
7x22 This Is Not Gonna End Well
2010-05-24
8x01 Three Girls and a Guy Named Bud
2010-09-20
8x02 A Bottle of Wine and a Jackhammer
2010-09-27
8x03 A Pudding-Filled Cactus
2010-10-04
8x04 Hookers, Hookers, Hookers
2010-10-11
8x05 The Immortal Mr. Billy Joel
2010-10-18
8x06 Twanging Your Magic Clanger
2010-10-25
8x07 The Crazy Bitch Gazette
2010-11-01
8x08 Springtime on a Stick
2010-11-08
8x09 A Good Time in Central Africa
2010-11-15
8x10 Ow, Ow, Don't Stop
2010-11-22
8x11 Dead from the Waist Down
2010-12-06
8x12 Chocolate Diddlers or My Puppy's Dead
2010-12-13
8x13 Skunk, Dog Crap and Ketchup
2011-01-03
8x14 Lookin' for Japanese Subs
2011-01-17
8x15 Three Hookers and a Philly Cheesesteak
2011-02-07
8x16 That Darn Priest
2011-02-14
9x01 Nice to Meet You, Walden Schmidt
2011-09-19
9x02 People Who Love Peepholes
2011-09-26
9x03 Big Girls Don't Throw Food
2011-10-03
9x04 Nine Magic Fingers
2011-10-10
9x05 A Giant Cat Holding a Churro
2011-10-17
9x06 The Squat and Hover
2011-10-24
9x07 Those Fancy Japanese Toilets
2011-10-31
9x08 Thank You for the Intercourse
2011-11-07
9x09 Frodo's Headshots
2011-11-14
9x10 A Fishbowl Full of Glass Eyes
2011-11-21
9x11 What a Lovely Landing Strip
2011-12-05
9x12 One False Move, Zimbabwe!
2011-12-12
9x13 Slowly and in a Circular Fashion
2012-01-02
9x14 A Possum on Chemo
2012-01-16
9x15 The Duchess of Dull-in-Sack
2012-02-06
9x16 Sips, Sonnets and Sodomy
2012-02-13
9x17 Not in My Mouth!
2012-02-20
9x18 The War Against Gingivitis
2012-02-27
9x19 Palmdale, Ech
2012-03-19
9x20 Grandma's Pie
2012-04-09
9x21 Mr. Hose Says "Yes"
2012-04-16
9x22 Why We Gave Up Women
2012-04-30
9x23 The Straw in My Donut Hole
2012-05-07
9x24 Oh Look! Al-Qaeda!
2012-05-14
10x01 I Changed My Mind About the Milk
2012-09-27
10x02 A Big Bag of Dog
2012-10-04
10x03 Four Balls, Two Bats and One Mitt
2012-10-11
10x04 You Do Know What the Lollipop's For
2012-10-18
10x05 That's Not What They Call It in Amsterdam
2012-10-25
10x06 Ferrets, Attack!
2012-11-01
10x07 Avoid the Chinese Mustard
2012-11-08
10x08 Something My Gynecologist Said
2012-11-15
10x09 I Scream When I Pee
2012-11-29
10x10 One Nut Johnson
2012-12-06
10x11 Give Santa a Tail-Hole
2012-12-13
10x12 Welcome to Alancrest
2013-01-03
10x13 Grab a Feather and Get in Line
2013-01-10
10x14 Run, Steven Staven! Run!
2013-01-31
10x15 Paint It, Pierce It or Plug It
2013-02-07
10x16 Advantage: Fat, Flying Baby
2013-02-14
10x17 Throgwarten Middle School Mysteries
2013-02-21
10x18 The 9:04 from Pemberton
2013-03-07
10x19 Big Episode. Someone Stole a Spoon
2013-03-14
10x20 Bazinga! That's from a TV Show
2013-04-04
10x21 Another Night with Neil Diamond
2013-04-25
10x22 My Bodacious Vidalia
2013-05-02
10x23 Cows, Prepare to Be Tipped
2013-05-09
11x01 Nangnangnangnang
2013-09-26
11x02 I Think I Banged Lucille Ball
2013-10-03
11x03 This Unblessed Biscuit
2013-10-10
11x04 Clank, Clank, Drunken Skank
2013-10-17
11x05 Alan Harper, Pleasing Women Since 2003
2013-10-24
11x06 Justice in Star-Spangled Hot Pants
2013-11-07
11x07 Some Kind of Lesbian Zombie
2013-11-14
11x08 Mr. Walden, He Die. I Clean Room.
2013-11-21
11x09 Numero Uno Accidente Lawyer
2013-12-05
11x10 On Vodka, On Soda, On Blender, On Mixer!
2013-12-12
11x11 Tazed in the Lady Nuts
2014-01-02
11x12 Baseball. Boobs. Boobs. Baseball.
2014-01-09
11x13 Bite Me, Supreme Court
2014-01-30
11x14 Three Fingers of Crème de Menthe
2014-02-06
11x15 Cab Fare and a Bottle of Penicillin
2014-02-27
11x16 How to Get Rid of Alan Harper
2014-03-06
11x17 Welcome Home, Jake
2014-03-13
11x18 West Side Story
2014-04-03
11x19 Lan Mao Shi Zai Wuding Shang
2014-04-10
11x20 Lotta Delis in Little Armenia
2014-04-24
11x21 Dial 1-900-Mix-A-Lot
2014-05-01
11x22 Oh, WALD-E, Good Times Ahead
2014-05-08
12x01 The Ol' Mexican Spinach
2014-10-30
12x02 A Chic Bar in Ibiza
2014-11-06
12x03 Glamping in a Yurt
2014-11-13
12x04 Thirty-Eight, Sixty-Two, Thirty-Eight
2014-11-20
12x05 Oontz. Oontz. Oontz.
2014-11-27
12x06 Alan Shot a Little Girl
2014-12-04
12x07 Sex with an Animated Ed Asner
2014-12-11
12x08 Family, Bublé, Deep-Fried Turkey
2014-12-18
12x09 Bouncy, Bouncy, Bouncy, Lyndsey
2015-01-08
12x10 Here I Come, Pants!
2015-01-15
12x11 For Whom the Booty Calls
2015-01-22
12x12 A Beer-Battered Rip-Off
2015-01-29
12x13 Boompa Loved His Hookers
2015-02-05
12x14 Don't Give a Monkey a Gun
2015-02-12
12x15 Of Course He's Dead (1)
2015-02-19
12x16 Of Course He's Dead (2)
2015-02-19
0x01 Original Pilot - Most Chicks Won't Eat Veal
0x02 Jake's A Regular Kid
0x03 Jennifer Taylor on Charlie Sheen, Jon Cryer Marriage Problems
0x04 Jon Cryer wins an Emmy for Two and a Half Men at the 2009 Primetime Emmy Awards
0x05 Behind the Scenes
0x06 Finding Angus
0x07 Getting Charlie Sheen
0x08 Jennifer Taylor
0x09 Jon's Advice to Charlie
0x10 Mama's Boys
0x11 Marin Hinkle
0x12 Two and a Half Men and CSI - Behind the Scenes Cross Over
0x13 Two and a Half Men and CSI - Behind the Scenes Cross Over 2
0x14 Bloopers Season 01
0x15 Bloopers Season 02
0x16 Bloopers Season 03
0x17 Bloopers Season 04
0x18 Bloopers Season 05
0x19 Bloopers Season 06
0x20 Bloopers Season 07
0x21 Bloopers Season 08
0x22 Bloopers Season 09
0x23 Bloopers Season 10
0x24 Bloopers Season 11
0x25 Bloopers Season 12
0x26 Two and a Half Men - In the Beginning
0x27 Two Men Talking About Two and a Half Men
0x28 The 100th episode of Two and a Half Men
0x29 "Must Pause TV" - The story of Chuck Lorre
0x30 Two and a Half Men: Dying Is Easy, Comedy Is Hard
0x31 CSI-Episode: Two and a Half Deaths
0x32 Growing up Harper
0x33 The Women of Two and a Half Men
0x34 Charlie's EX Reunion
0x35 Two and a Half Men Version 2.0
0x36 The Billionaire Upgrade: How Walden Schmidt redesigned the house in Malibu
0x37 Two Manly Men - Singing and Dancing
